We always suggest that you do not date while your divorce is pending as it may hurt your case. While your divorce is pending, you are married. Your spouse can use your dating against you. Further, moving in with a lover could cause problems with custody, visitation, or maintenance. If you do date, be prepared to face the problems that may arise. Doing so often complicates things and complications in divorce usually equal increased time in reaching a resolution and increased fees spent addressing the complications.
Many cases are presented at the initial interview as being “amicable” divorces, with the client saying that he or she thinks everything will go smoothly, and there will be a reasonable settlement concluded in a short period of time. Sometimes this is the case. Often, when it is not, the reason is that someone has started seeing another person, and the other spouse decides to make this a huge issue. While the Judge may not care whether or not you are dating, if your spouse does, it can turn negotiations ugly and you will end up paying dearly in terms of time and attorney’s fees for what may have been a very limited relationship with someone else.
Please consider that emotions are extremely high during this entire process. If you are the one who dates, you may find how hurt your spouse is and how eager the other attorney is to come to your spouse’s rescue. Also, please consider whether or not you want someone you are dating to attend a deposition to answer a lot of embarrassing questions. They may even need to hire an attorney to attend a deposition with them. Once again, please talk to your attorney before you decide to date. If you are already seeing someone, discuss how to handle it immediately.