By: Alan Freed
Divorce can be an expensive, exhausting, emotional experience. For most people, even those who wish to end their marriage, the process of undoing a long-standing relationship creates incredible stress, as they make decisions concerning their finances and their children and, in the process, reshape their futures.
Once the legal process ends (and that may be in a matter of months or, sometimes, years) both of the former spouses want to find a new normal and establish routines with their children, their extended families, and their friends, all of which takes time.
Some formerly married people, particularly those who have resolved their disputes in more traditional ways (trials or settlements negotiated by their attorneys) will not have the opportunity to effectively deal with the issues that led to the breakup of their marriages. They want vindication from a court, or they want acknowledgment from a former spouse. In extreme cases, they want to use the communications that become necessary when post-divorce issues arise to rehash their marital relationship or to get answers about why it ended.
Unfortunately, the courts are not geared to give ex-spouses those kinds of answers. Judges can help enforce the orders contained in the divorce agreements and judgments, but they don’t have the training or the resources to resolve the lingering sadness or anger that remains from the divorce process.
Take advantage, instead, of the support of your family and friends and the skills of mental health professionals who are experienced in helping the formerly married become happy singles.
The family law attorneys at Paule, Camazine & Blumenthal can help you sort out which problems are legal and which will require other kinds of professional assistance.